“I stared, hypnotically, at the rectangular contraption at my feet with loathing and nausea. Wiping away beads of sticky perspiration from my forehead, I forced myself to stand on the machine. With a Formula One heartbeat and loud, laboured breathing, I knew that this moment couldn’t be avoided. Oh God, no, help me pleeaaaase…. I can’t do it…..oh. Silence.”
Actually, it wasn’t as bad as I’d expected. In my imagination I’d gained 28 lbs since quitting smoking 3½ years ago, but my electronic scales revealed an increase of 21. Things aren’t always quite as terrible as they seem, when we lift our heads from the sand and face reality. I became the victor in the war against nicotine and whilst I haven’t reached the obesity stage (yet) it is time to fend off the increasing bulge.
Weight is not the only well-covered bone of contention in my life. Five years ago, I started writing a children’s adventure novel. There are only 30,000 words of my child-like imagination typed on crisp white sheets, but there are treble that number in scribbled notes.
It is SO easy to make excuses and put things off until tomorrow, next week, next month, after Christmas, in the New Year, when work is less busy…. the list goes on. Also, I’ve been so content with the love of my life, my other chance of happiness, my husband. Five years ago I was miserable and it’s often said that creativity comes from adversity. Today, I’ve learned how to love and life is wonderful, apart from a couple of inky blots on the landscape: my weight issue and the increasing desire to blow the dust of my manuscript and conjure up the inspiration to continue with the book.
To help plan a routine of when to work, write, exercise, etc., I’ve decided to only blog one day per week. Next post: 16th January.